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- Yo momma so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
- Yo momma so fat her nickname is "DAMN"
- Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.
- Yo momma so fat were in her right now
- Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise
- Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone
- Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors
- Yo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...
- Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world.
- Yo momma so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy
- Yo momma so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
- Yo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions!
- Yo momma so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
- Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"
- Yo momma so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized
- Yo momma so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway
- Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
- Yo momma so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets
- Yo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th
- Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
- Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"
- Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
- Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
- Yo momma so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
- Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it.
- Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
- Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
- Yo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
- Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code!
- Yo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
- Yo momma so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved!
- Yo momma so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
- Yo momma so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
- Yo momma so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...
- Yo momma so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
- Yo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
- Yo momma so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
- Yo momma so fat you have to roll her ass in flour and look for the wet spot to fuck her!
- Yo momma so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the bitches good side!
- Yo momma so fat she wakes up in sections!
- Yo momma so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
- Yo momma so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.
- Yo momma so fat she was mistaken for God's bowling ball!
- Yo momma so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!
- Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
- Yo momma so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!
- Yo momma so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!
- Yo momma so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
- Yo momma so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!
- Yo momma so fat she's on both sides of the family!
- Yo momma so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
- Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
- Yo momma so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!
- Yo momma so fat that when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips!
- Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!
- Yo momma so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!
- Yo momma so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
- Yo momma so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
- Yo momma so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!
- Yo momma so fat she got hit by a parked car!
- Yo momma so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
- Yo momma so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!
- Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
- Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people say "Taxi!"
- Yo momma so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!
- Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller!
- Yo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave she landed on 12th
- Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps she pulls down the bridge too
- Yo momma so fat she steps on a scale & it goes one at a time please
- Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it!
- Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!
- Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it.
- Yo momma so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
- Yo momma so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping
- Yo momma so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
- Yo momma so fat when she back up she beep.
- Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.
- Yo momma so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
- Yo momma so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
- Yo momma so fat she influences the tides.
- Yo momma so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
- Yo momma so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out.
- Yo momma so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
- Yo momma so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
- Yo momma so fat she's on both sides of the family!
- Yo momma so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
- Yo momma so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her
- Yo momma so fat she stands in two time zones.
- Yo momma so fat I tried to drive around her and I ran out of gas.
- Yo momma so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops.
- Yo momma so fat shes on both sides of the family.
- Yo momma so fat it takes her two trips to haul ass
- Yo momma so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through
- Yo momma so fat when the bitch goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
- Yo momma so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.
- Yo momma so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
- Yo momma so fat she cant reach her back pocket.
- Yo momma so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!
- Yo momma so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.
- Yo momma so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water
- Yo momma so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out
- Yo momma so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
- Yo momma so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
- Yo momma so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.
- Yo momma so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
- Yo momma so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.
- Yo momma so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
- Yo momma so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
- Yo momma so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
- Yo momma so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse.
- Yo momma so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
- Yo momma so fat she was baptised in the ocean.
- Yo momma so fat she has to iron her clothes in the driveway.
- Yo momma so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.
- Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"
- Yo momma so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!
- Yo momma so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
- Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!
- Yo momma so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.
-
- =-> SO STUPID,
- Yo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
- Yo momma so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends
- Yo momma so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon
- Yo momma so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read
- Yo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
- Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
- Yo momma so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
- Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
- Yo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!
- Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
- Yo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!
- Yo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
- Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
- Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterbacks a refund!
- Yo momma so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
- Yo momma so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.
- Yo momma so stupid she asked you "What is the number for 911
- Yo momma so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
- Yo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
- Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
- Yo momma so stupid she stole free bread.
- Yo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
- Yo momma so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
- Yo momma so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
- Yo momma so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
- Yo momma so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
- Yo momma so stupid when asked on an application, "Sex?", she marked, "M, F and sometimes Wednesday too."
- Yo momma so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
- Yo momma so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
- Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.
- Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
- Yo momma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
- Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
- Yo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
- Yo momma so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.
- Yo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
- Yo momma so stupid she jumped out the window and went up.
- Yo momma so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund.
- Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.
- Yo momma so stupid that under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics".
- Yo momma so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
- Yo momma so stupid she put lipstick on her forehead, talking about she was trying to makeup her mind.
- Yo momma so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
- Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals".
- Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
- Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it".
- Yo momma so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
- Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
- Yo momma so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck.
- Yo momma so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
- Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras.
- Yo momma so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her.
- Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.
- Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"
- Yo momma so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
- Yo momma so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
- Yo momma so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
- Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.
- Yo momma so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower!
- Yo momma so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!
- Yo momma so ugly they put her in dough and made monster cookies!
- Yo momma so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!
- Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!
- Yo momma so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!
- Yo momma so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her!
- Yo momma so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!
- Yo momma so ugly she had to get her baby drunk to breastfeed it!
- Yo momma so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!
- Yo momma so ugly The NHL banned her for life.
- Yo momma so ugly people go as her for Halloween.
- Yo momma so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.
- Yo momma so ugly she scares the roaches away.
- Yo momma so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
- Yo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
- Yo momma so old I told her to act her own age, and the bitch died.
- Yo momma so old she has Jesus beeper number!
- Yo momma so old her social security number is 1!
- Yo momma so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch.
- Yo momma so old that when she was in school there was no history class.
- Yo momma so old she owes Jesus 3 bucks!
- Yo momma so old she's in Jesus's yearbook!
- Yo momma so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
- Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it.
- Yo momma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
- Yo momma so old she owes Jesus a nickel.
- Yo momma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
- Yo momma so old she ran track with dinosaurs.
- Yo momma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.
- Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade.
- Yo momma so old and stupid she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said, "Li'l Mary will never amount to anything".
- Yo momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving."
- Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention!
- Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush!
- Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!!!
- Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"
- Yo momma so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.
- Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.
- Yo momma so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp.
- Yo momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage."
- Yo momma so poor she drives a peanut.
- Yo momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.
- Yo momma so dark she went to night school and was marked absent!
- Yo momma so dark she spits chocolate milk!
- Yo momma so dark that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal.
- Yo momma so dark she has to wear white gloves when she eats Tootsie Rolls to keep from eating her fingers.
- Yo momma so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater.
- Yo momma so short she poses for trophies!
- Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!
- Yo momma so short she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime.
- Yo momma so short she can play handball on the curb.
- Yo momma so short she does backflips under the bed.
- Yo momma so nasty when she goes to a hair salon, she told the stylist to cut her hair and she opened up her shirt.
- Yo momma so nasty She gotta put ice down her drawers to keep the crabs fresh!
- Yo momma so nasty she made speed stick slow down.
- Yo momma so nasty she brings crabs to the beach
- Yo momma so nasty she made right guard turn left.
- Yo momma so nasty the fishery be paying her to leave
- Yo momma so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.
- Yo momma so nasty that her shit is glad to escape.
- Yo momma so nasty Ozzie Ozbourne refused to bite her head off
- Yo momma so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh.
- Yo momma so nasty I called her for phone sex and she gave me an ear infection.
- Yo momma like potato chips-- Fri-to Lay
- Yo momma like a screen door, after a couple bangs she tends to loosen up!
- Yo momma like the pillbury doughboy - everyone gets a poke!
- Yo momma like a doorknob - everyone gets a turn!
- Yo momma like a T.V. set, even a three year old can turn her on!
- Yo momma like a doorknob, everyone gets a turn!
- Yo momma like a bus, fifty cents and she's ready to ride!
- Yo momma like a golf course, everyone GETS a hole in one!
- Yo momma like the railway system, she gets laid all over the country!
- Yo momma like a tomato source bottle, everyone gets a squeeze out of her!
- Yo momma like a shotgun: one cock and she blows!
- Yo momma like a hardware store: 4 cents a screw!
- Yo momma like Domino's pizza-- Something for nothing
- Yo momma like a refridgerator: everyone likes to put their meat in her!
- Yo momma like cake mix, 15 servings per package!
- Yo momma like a rifle... four cocks and she's loaded.
- Yo momma like a bowling ball. She's picked up, fingered, and then thrown in the gutter.
- Yo momma like a bus: Guys climb on and off her all day long.
- Yo momma like a Toyota: "Oh what a feelin'!"
- Yo momma like Orange Crush: "Good Vibrations!"
- Yo momma like a bubble-gum machine... five cents a blow.
- Yo momma like chinese food: sweet, sour and cheap!
- Yo momma like a vaccuum cleaner.....a real good suck.
- Yo momma so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!
- Yo momma so hairy she's got afros on her nipples!
- Yo momma so hairy she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock.
- Yo momma so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
- Yo momma so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.
- Yo momma so slutty she could suck-start a Harley!
- Yo momma so slutty she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch ball!
- Yo momma so slutty when she got a new mini skirt, everyone commented on her nice belt!
- Yo momma so slutty she was on the cover of wheaties, with her legs open, and it said "breakfast of the champs"
- Yo momma so slutty that I could've been your daddy, but the guy in line behind me had the correct change.
- Yo momma so slutty she had her own "Hands across her ass" charity drive
- Yo momma so slutty that when she heard Santa Claus say HO HO HO she thought she was getting it three times.
- Yo momma so slutty I fucked her and I's a chick!
- Yo momma so slutty she blind and seeing another man.
- Yo momma nose so big you can go bowling with her boogers!
- Yo momma nose so big she makes Pinochio look like a cat!
- Yo momma so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!
- Yo momma so greasy she sweats Crisco!
- Yo momma so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her
- Yo momma teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles!
- Yo momma teeth are so yellow she spits butter!
- Yo momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.
- Yo momma so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio
- Yo momma so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
- Yo momma so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.
- Yo momma so bald even a wig wouldn't help!
- Yo momma so bald you can see whats on her mind
- Yo momma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.
- Yo momma so tall she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon.
- Yo momma so tall she did a back-flip and kicked Jesus in the mouth.
- Yo momma so tall she tripped in Michigan and hit her head in Florida.
- Yo momma so flat she's jealous of the wall!
- Yo momma's glasses are so thick that when she looks on a map she can see people waving.
- Yo momma's glasses are so thick she can see into the future.
- Yo momma has an afro with a chin strap.
- Yo momma has one leg and a bicycle.
- Yo momma has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses.
- Yo momma has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
- Yo momma has one hand and a Clapper.
- Yo momma has a wooden afro with an "X" carved in the back.
- Yo momma has green hair and thinks she's a tree.
- Yo momma has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.
- Yo momma has a 'fro with warning lights.
- Yo momma has 10 fingers--all on the same hand.
- Yo momma has a glass eye with a fish in it.
- Yo momma has a short leg and walks in circles.
- Yo momma has a short arm and can't applaude.
- Yo momma got so many freckles she looks like a hamburger!
- Yo momma got two wooden legs and one is one backward.
- Yo momma got three fingers and a banjo.
- Yo momma got a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.
- Yo momma got a bald head with a part and sideburns.
- Yo momma got a' afro, wit' a chin strap!!!!
- Yo momma got a wooden leg with branches.
- Yo momma got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.
- Yo momma got a metal afro with rusty sideburns.
- Yo momma house so small that when she orders a large pizza she had to go outside to eat it.
- Yo momma house so small she has to go outside to eat a large pizza.
- Yo momma house so small you have to go outside to change your mind.
- Yo momma house so dirty roaches ride around on dune buggies!
- Yo momma house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside.
- Yo momma hair so short when she braided it they looked like stiches.
- Yo momma hair so short she curls it with rice.
- Yo momma head so big she has to step into her shirts.
- Yo momma head so big it shows up on radar.
- Yo momma head so small she use a tea-bag as a pillow.
- Yo momma head so small that she got her ear pierced and died.
- Yo momma wears knee-pads and yells "Curb Service!"
- Yo momma feet are so big her shoes have to have license plates!
- Yo momma aint so bad...she would give you the hair off of her back!
- Yo momma lips so big, Chap Stick had to invent a spray.
- It took yo momma 10 tries to get her drivers license, she couldnt get used to the front seat!
- You were born out of your mother's arse 'cos her cunt was too busy.
- Yo momma hips are so big, people set their drinks on them.
- Yo momma hair so nappy she has to take Tylenol just to comb it.
- Yo momma so clumsy she got tangled up in a cordless phone.
- Yo momma so wrinkled, she has to screw her hat on.
- Yo momma twice the man you are.
- Yo momma cross-eyed and watches TV in stereo.
- Yo momma is missing a finger and can't count past 9.
- Yo momma arms are so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear.
- Yo momma middle name is Rambo.
- Yo momma in a wheelchair and says, "You ain't gonna puch me 'round no more."
- Yo momma rouchy, the McDonalds she works in doesn't even serve Happy Meals.
- Yo momma so stupid was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday.
- If my dog had a face as ugly as your momma's, I'd shave his ass and make him walk backwards.
- Yo momma mouth so big, she speaks in surround sound.
- Yo momma gums are so black she spits Yoo-hoo.
- Yo momma breath smell so bad when she yawns her teeth duck.
- I saw your momma at the freak show petting the world's largest turtle.
- I saw your momma kicking a can down the street. I asked her what she was doing, and she said "Moving."
- Yo momma teeth are so rotten, when she smiles they look like dice.
- Yo mamma so fat, she wore a X t-shirt, and a helicopter landed on her
- yo mama so skinny, she hang glides with a Dorito
- yo mama so stupid, she thinks hamburger helper comes with another person
- yo mama so stupid, she thinks menopause is a button
- Yo momma like a refridgerator: everyone likes to put their meat in her!
- Yo momma like a T.V. set, even a three year old can turn her on!
- Yo momma like a screen door, after a couple bangs she tends to loosen up!
- Yo momma like a doorknob - everyone gets a turn!
- Yo momma like the pillbury doughboy - everyone gets a poke!
- Yo momma so nasty She gotta put ice down her drawers to keep the crabs fresh!
- Yo momma so nasty she made right guard turn left.
- Yo momma so nasty she made speed stick slow down.
- Yo momma so flat she's jealous of the wall!
- Yo momma teeth are so yellow I can't believe its not butter!
- You were born out of your mother's arse 'cos her cunt was too busy.
- Yo dick is so small, it looks like you have a second bellybutton.
- Yo daddy is like cement, it takes him two days to get hard.